I Hate Olives

I am cursed. If I were to keep track of all the times I have ordered a pizza and asked for NO olives and then received olives on the pizza, I think about 85% of the time I get the damn olives. At first I thought it might be me. Maybe I wasn't clear about how I said no olives. I would say, "No olives please." And then I would get green olives. So I thought maybe in pizza making world, olives only meant black olives. So I changed my request to, "No black olives and no green olives please." However, I still received green olives, but not black. Maybe they stopped listening after they heard black olives. Another time I said that same thing and they gave me black olives and no green peppers. Definitely a listening problem. So then I changed again. "No olives of any kind. Not black, not green. I don't want any olives." Sigh. Again, green but not black olives. This happened again today. She even repeated my order back to me, "Vegetarian pizza, sub spinach for broccoli, and no olives." Hallelujah. I went picked up the pizza, heard a little voice inside say....check for olives.....but I ignored it, being an eternal optimist, and went on my way. I got to school, opened it up, and there they were. Tons of green olives. Why?!?! What am I supposed to learn from this? I am just supposed to like olives? I don't understand. It doesn't seem hard. And it isn't just one restaurant (although one is notorious for ignoring my no olive request), it happens at several places where I order from. So I've made a decision. I am going to now say to the person taking my order, "I do not want any olives. I am allergic to olives. I can't eat olives of any kind. I will go into anaphylactic shock if I eat olives. I carry an Epi-Pen for emergencies. I may die. Please don't put olives on my pizza." We'll see how that works.